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Why Do Narcissists Lie
Are narcissists compulsive liars? Can a narcissist ever stop lying, even when confronted with evidence of their lies? Learn all about narcissistic personality disorder.
If you are involved with a narcissist, then you are quite used to being lied to. Their constant lies simply come with the territory. To a normal person, it may be very perplexing to be lied to all the time by someone who purports to care for you. Learn about what the narcissist seems to gain from telling lies all time.
About Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a mental health disorder that stems from an unhealthy and inflated view of self. At least, that’s how it appears on the outside. Inside, though, the NPD really has a very low opinion of him or herself. All of their heinous behaviors are driven by a need to pump themselves up in their own eyes and others’.
Individuals with NPD often seek out partners who have certain traits. For instance, they may be a compassionate and sensitive person, but may also be needy and have low self-esteem. Like a leech that latches to a blood source, the NPD latches onto its victim.
Over time, the NPD slowly chips away at the victim’s sense of self-worth. Through lies and gaslighting, they put them down and cause them to doubt themselves. Through this emotional abuse, they can control the victim. But because the NPD has no conscience, they never feel regret or remorse for mistreating their partner.
Someone with NPD demands constant admiration and praise while keeping their victim from receiving any. A narcissist does not want any competition.
Symptoms of NPD include:
- Lacks empathy or compassion for others.
- Feels entitled to special treatment.
- Expects others to fawn over them.
- Belittles others; talks down to people.
- Takes advantage of the others’ weaknesses to build themselves up.
- Self important; arrogant.
- May hog the conversation.
- Emotionally detached.
- Believes that others envy him.
- Boastful and pretentious.
- Becomes angry if challenged.
- Torments the victim with fear.
- Has a bad temper; sudden angry outbursts.
- Easily slighted, sensitive to criticism.
- Doesn’t notice the needs of others.
- Emotionally stingy.
- May isolate their victim from friends.
- Feels insecure inside; self-loathing.
- Not willing to go to therapy.
The NPD will refuse to get help, believing that they are perfect and beyond reproach.
Why Someone With NPD Lies
Why do narcissists lie… all the time? If you confront them with proof of the lie, they will still attempt to lie their way out of it. What inspires lying?
Simply put, the NPD lies in order to inflate his or her own self-esteem. They lie to the other person, to beat them. By inflating truths, they attempt to make their own skills or abilities seem superior to the other person. In other words, they are a boar, the type of person people avoid at a party.
When the NPD lies, he or she is trying to make themselves appear dominant. They lie for self-gain believing that telling mistruths makes them look smarter than the other person. Having a victim at their side who they can lie to provides them with a constant narcissistic supply, someone that fuels their sickness. When they impress their partner with their lies, they receive a rush or hit to feel better about themselves.
Lies Often Turn Into Gaslighting
For the NPD, the lies are often a prelude to gaslighting. Gaslighting is a psychological weapon used by some to keep a person emotionally off-balance. When they lie to the person’s face about what may have occurred, they cause the victim to question their own sanity.
When the victim confronts the NPD with solid evidence of a misdeed, they will be met with lies. Not only will the NPD lie and deny it ever happened, but they are also likely to attack. This is where the gaslighting begins. They will attempt to twist the event around to become the fault of the victim.
You Are the Narcissistic Supply Source
There is a reason why the NPD wants to keep their victim around; the victim fulfills a need for them. They fill up their NPD cup daily by sucking the life out of the unsuspecting partner. Thus, the victim is not even aware of the role they play in the illness at first.
The NPD will therefore go to great lengths to keep the victim from leaving them. Some tactics they use include:
- They may cry false tears to elicit sympathy, thus keeping the victim engaged.
- They may use force or become violent to assert dominance.
- They may try to manipulate the victim through guilt.
- They may threaten the victim by taking the money away or causing some type of harm.
- They make the victim feel bad about themselves so they won’t think they can do any better.
- They may threaten suicide, although it is an empty threat.
Breaking Free From an NPD Liar
If you have woken up to realize you are in a relationship with an NPD, you should run, not walk, to the exits. The sad truth is that these people are rarely able to change their ways, mostly because they don’t want to. In their own minds they feel they never do wrong, so why go to therapy?
Partner with a therapist who can offer guidance and support as you detach from the NPD. These people can and do become violent when faced with their N-source leaving them. Prepare for the false promises and tears, as they play on your sense of compassion to keep you entrenched in the abuse cycle.
So, can a narcissist stop lying, even with evidence of their lies? The answer is very clear: no, they cannot.
Elevation Behavioral Health Provides Residential Luxury Mental Health Treatment
Elevation Behavioral Health can help someone who is the victim of a narcissist. Our dedicated team is here to guide you toward wellness and discovering new insights. For questions about our program, please call us today at (888) 561-0868.